By Published On: December 27th, 2018180 words0.9 min read

When Fran was 5 she would sing “He’s got the whole world in his hands” in a whisper to herself as she fell asleep under her Toy Story bedspread.

At age 12, Fran felt guilty because she didn’t sing to Jesus any more and didn’t know why. But she felt embarrassed about most things now, so she hoped it was just a phase.

At 19, Fran and her best friend Lacy told each other “He’s got the whole world in his hands” before every test. It was just a joke but Fran felt comforted anyways.

On Fran’s 24th birthday she put on a fake smile and went out with her friends. She never would have predicted the loss she had incurred over the previous 9 months. When she was crying in the Mexican restaurant ladies room later that night, Lacy gave Fran a hug and offered a “He’s got the whole world in his hands?” Those words meant little to Fran now, a reminder of a more certain past. She squeezed Lacy back and held in the sobs.